friends

Pet Peeves and People Problems

Here, for you to delight in, are five of my pet peeves, and, to balance it out, five little things that brighten my day.


The Peeves

1. Mushrooms

Let me explain. I love eating mushrooms: mushroom soup, penne con funghi, mushroom in claypot stew…but when they’re alive? And in the ground? Ohmygosh, they freak me out. Look at them, so orange and curly and weird. I shudder at you, ugly fungal growths. Shudder.

2. People who Capitalise Things that are Not supposed to Be In Capitals

In order to Illustrate just how Annoying this is, I am going to Randomly turn Regular Words into Pronouns. Come on, People! Capitalisation is Not a form of placing Emphasis! It is grammatically incorrect and Drives Some Poor People Crazy.

3. Sidewalk hoggers

I have no problems with you, other than you walk too slow and sometimes you line up with your friends/partner/children and form a human wall. Sometimes you even zig zag at a leisurely pace so it’s very difficult to circumvent you. Grr.

4. Being poked

Poke. “Hi Grace!”

Do not do the above.

5. People peering over my shoulder

Not because I occupy myself with anything of the dodgy nature. But please ask, cough, or make your presence known. Don’t pretend you’re not looking. I know you are. I have eyes everywhere.

*

Now you’ve all seen how petty and ridiculous my pet peeves are ;D And I know they are, but we all have them. Last week, I was chatting to a few people I’ve never really had to chance to speak to before. Coming away from that conversation, I realised that a lot of the time, the disagreements, chafes and animosity between people arise from nothing more than pet peeves. We see something in a person that instantly makes a blip on our Annoyance Radar. We make a snap judgement, and then everything else that person does is tainted by our preformed conceptions.

This happens, I think, even more in group situations. A collective opinion somehow becomes more of a truth. But the lesson I’ve learnt is that you should always venture out and make your own judgements. Talk to people properly before you like or dislike them. And never draw a final verdict…because more often than not, you’ll look back and realise you were wrong.

*

The little happinesses:

1. Waking up and realising you can sleep in as long as you like

2. When you come out of the toilet at a restaurant to see that your food has arrived (I stole this one from Pulp Fiction!)

3. Compliments from strangers

4. That gentle ache in your muscles from a good exercise

5. Parcels on the doorstep

*

My final exam is tomorrow! I am so nervous. Wish me luck, amigos. See you on the other side! I can’t wait for the sweet, sweet taste of freedom…for four weeks at least :)

Love,

Grace

You make your own enemies

Snapshot of my day…

Reading: The Art of War, by Sun-tzu

Listening: to other people talk

Wondering: if someone could invent an algorithm to predict traffic patterns? Please?

I used to think that there are always certain people you can never get along with. And maybe that’s true. Narcissists, perverts and people who don’t know how to spell ‘separately’ would probably be at the top of my Avoid At All Costs list. (I kid…some of my friends are perverts.) But lately I’ve come to realise that you can get along with almost everyone if you put your mind to it.

Sometimes you meet someone and you click. Maybe you have a similar interest, or mannerisms, or background. More often than not, though, you are surrounded by people who are different from you in some way or another. You have conflicting opinions. They think the world revolves around them. You shudder at the way they pronounce ‘specialty.’ Or maybe they smell bad and you just don’t know why.

It sounds selfish, but I reckon you’ve got to weigh up the effort of making a friend out of them, against the benefit of having them on your side. I know, it sounds like some awful calculating method of self-promotion, but I promise it’s for the sake of your own health. Some people are not good for you. They will sap your energy like a carbon freeze.

My new rule of thumb is as follows: befriend those who are interesting, multi-dimensional, different from you, opinionated but not obnoxious, compassionate, gentle, altruistic, idealistic, intelligent. Befriend people who are from all walks of life. People whom you respect. People that you feel you can learn something from. Who bring out the best in you.

Who do I respect the most? I think I respect two kinds of people. One, people who are curious about the many fascinating aspects of life. People who are hungry to learn make me want to learn from them and from the world. Two, people who are compassionate. Selflessness is a remarkable trait.

And the rest? I think I’m going to give up caring about what they think. I officially have passed the point in life where I want to worry about the opinions of those who hardly even matter to me.

Most importantly…fill your inner circle with your favourite people. The few you respect the most; the ones who paint the world for you in brighter colours. In the end, they matter the most. They refuel you at the end of a long day and help mould you into the kind of person you want to become (like two pieces of flint, carving each other into shape). If you put yourself next to people who are narrow-minded, you will become narrow-minded. If you keep the company of the ever-curious, perhaps you can discover the world.

PS. I forgot to mention: having a bad sense of humour is unforgiveable. Just unforgiveable. No.

In other news, I read this book the other night:

 

It’s full of wonderful short stories with even wonderful-er illustrations. Shaun Tan is a master storyteller. Another book of his, The Arrival, comes highly recommended. Anyone who’s ever migrated from one country to another will relate closely to the story, which is told entirely in pictures.

Anyway, I’ll sign off now, since I’ve had my vent and it’s late and I’m too tired to make much sense. More next time!